Quotes

Saffron: You missed a spot.
Mal: Can't miss a place you've never been.

Mal: Good day!

Monty Reynolds: You made me love you and then you... I shaved off my beard for you, devil woman!

Simon: You're in a dangerous line of work, Jayne. Odds are you'll be under my knife again. Often. So I want you to understand one thing very clearly: No matter what you do or say or plot, no matter how you come down on us, I will never, ever harm you. River: Also, I can kill you with my brain.

River: Jayne is a girl's name.

Mal: Yeah. That went well.

Inara: Should I start with the part where you're stranded in the middle of nowhere or the part where you have no clothes?

Saffron: He's my husband.
Mal: Well, who in the damn galaxy ain't?

Mal: Petty?
Inara: I didn't mean petty.
Mal: So what did you mean?
Inara: Suoxì?
Mal: That's Chinese for petty.

Saffron: Durran, this isn't what it looks like.
Mal: Unless it looks like we're stealing your priceless Lassiter, 'cause, that's what we're doin'. Don't ask me 'bout the gun, though, 'cause that's new.
Durran Haymer: Well, I appreciate your honesty. Not, you know, a lot, but...

Jayne: She'll turn you in 'fore you can... say...”Don't turn me in, lady."

Jayne: That's crazy talk.
Simon: Then let's talk crazy.

Wash: I'm confused...
Saffron: You're asking yourself, if I've got the security codes, why don't I go in, grab it for myself.
Wash: No, actually... I was wondering... WHAT'S SHE DOING ON THIS SHIP? Didn't she try to kill us?
Saffron: Please... nobody died last time.

Monty: So… you guys have met.

Saffron: I'll die.
Mal: Well, as a courtesy, you might start getting busy on that, 'cause all this chatter ain't doin' me any kindness.

Saffron: This was all your fault, you know. I had a perfect crime lined up.
Mal: Sure. You were gonna steal a man's beard.

Mal: Your feminine wiles. Your… Companion training, or, some might say, uncanny ability to make a man sweaty and/or compliant, of which I have had just about enough of today.

Jayne: Well, as a rule, I say, girlfolk ain't to be trusted.

Simon: I'm… trying to think of a way for you to be cruder. I just… it's not coming.

Mal: No one's killin' any folk today, on account o' we got a very tight schedule, Yo-Saff-Bridg.

Saffron: You won't tell anyone about me breaking down.
Mal: I won't.
Saffron: Then I won't tell anyone how easily I got your gun out of your holster.

Saffron: You just may be the most gullible fool I ever marked. And that makes you special.